It’s usually pretty hard for me to get over people. Even when they have treated me wrong I always find that memory that makes me want to be pathetic and blow up their phone. Even after they say the want to see other people.. I’ve got issues. But it’s because I was focused on that one positive thing. All I have to do is switch my thoughts to think about any and everything they have done that I didn’t like. Not like over the top negativity but seriously if they want to leave me.. I need to move on. For example I knew my ex for 8 years we were together for a month.. When we were in person things were cool. Some good memories but I’m gonna focus on the night where I was alone and in the hospital and he was no where to be found and when I finally got a hold of him he was mad at me for blowing him up and didn’t even think to ask how I was feeling.. I don’t need that.
I always think it is weird when people ask me if I have a type. But I am starting to realize how important it is. Like to know what you like and don’t like so when a potential comes around you aren’t trying to figure it out. So I’m gonna start working on that. Or just in case they wanna come up with some technology similar to Build A Bear… Build A Husband? I’ll be ready.
Note to self: Move on if your head tells you, you deserve better. There’s always better, even when you think there isn’t. Just think about how many people are in the world, & you’re trippin about one.
I do not think I have ever let a breakup mess with me this much. Actually I know I haven’t.. He was so perfect in the beginning and a month later here we are… More like here I am because after all I have done he thinks we should talk to other people. And even after all that I am still searching… What did I do? How can I fix this? Why doesn’t feel the way I do? Why am I only good enough for half of him? Begging for attention even if it means an argument. I do not deserve this and yes we were only together for a month but we have known each other for eight years.. That should mean something right? Nope. Then he says I am annoying and caught up… That one hurt because all I thought I was doing was putting my all into something I thought would last.. Now we hate each other… My birthday is tomorrow…. Happy birthday to me.
What is wrong with you people who go around giving false hope.. Don’t say things you don’t mean. Don’t commit if it is not what you want. Just stop.. Because I’m always getting caught in the middle and I don’t have anything left to give.. Nothing.
Eventually I will forget about you. One day, I won’t think about you anymore. Or what we had. Or what we shared. Eventually, it will all just be a huge blur to me. Better things will start happening. I’ll be worried about more important things.
Nobody will protect you from your suffering. You can’t cry it away or eat it away or starve it away or walk it away or punch it away or even therapy it away. It’s just there, and you have to survive it. You have to endure it. You have to live through it and love it and move on and be better for it and run as far as you can in the direction of your best and happiest dreams across the bridge that was built by your own desire to heal.
You’re just about 37472929477275% irrelevant
#FlashbackFriday I would like to say I was pretty cute back in my YouTube days. I think I may start back up again. What do you think?! 😳